Welcome to my thesis, In Defence Of Silly Restaurants. The first thing you need to know is that Ave Mario is a Silly Restaurant. Its three separate themed areas go from Tuscan trattoria to ‘70s disco pad quicker than you can say Calm Your Tits. Yes, that’s the name of one of the cocktails. It’s a masterclass in daft glamour, party potential, and Italian food that has been given a truffle sidekick for no apparent reason. After entering through a set of double doors on Henrietta Street in Covent Garden, you are now entirely at the mercy of a 300-seat restaurant that operates as a limoncello‑glow Instagram filter.